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A guy walks into the local welfare office, marches straight up to the counter and says, "Hi . . . You know, I just HATE drawing welfare. I'd really rather have a job".

The social worker behind the counter says, "Your timing is excellent. We just got a job opening from a very wealthy old man who wants a chauffeur/bodyguard for his nymphomaniac daughter.

You'll have to drive around in his Beemer, and he'll supply all of your clothes .

Because of the long hours, meals will be provided. You'll be expected to escort her on her overseas holiday trips. You'll have a two-bedroom-furnished apartment above the garage.

The starting salary is $200,000 a year, including expenses."

The guy says, "You're bull ******** me!"

The social worker says, "Yeah, well, you started it."